Bad Religion

I glanced down at the front page of the local paper the other day and saw a horrific story splashed across the page. A three year old girl had been raped and murdered. Let that sink in for a minute. I wonder, with tragic happenings taking place on a global scale, where is God? It is hard to find faith in a God, or keep faith if I had any left, when I hear about innocence lost on a daily basis.

My quest for spirituality began as forced Catholicism when I was just a baby and continued until I was roughly nine years old. I was baptized Catholic, raised Catholic, attended catechism classes, First Communion and broke bread every Sunday. Yet even at such a young age I felt there was a deep sense of hypocrisy within the religion. My home life did not reflect the Catholic values and, although we prayed at home, nothing else seemed to be about the church or religion until Sunday came and we went to church. As I grew older and started to move away from the Catholic church and religion in general, questioning the Bible, studying religions from around the world, I realized that all religions are full of this hypocrisy.

The hardest aspect of religious faith, for me, is how to keep faith in something that proves so contradictory. Perhaps it is because I am a cut and dry person, black and white, no gray. Perhaps I am just too critical and analytical. But for whatever reasons, I cannot find that deep sense of faith that tells me that God has a plan for us all, especially when such terrible things happen. Why did that little girl have to endure such trauma and pain in her short life? Why did God put him on this earth if He is all knowing, wouldn't He know that this man would be a predator? And if Jesus died for the sins of the world, why did He die for a child murderer and rapist? These are the issues that I have with organized religion and why I choose to live my life differently.

I follow the simple philosophies: treat others the way that you want to be treated; with dignity, respect and humanity. Do your best everyday to be a good person and live your life with integrity and respect for yourself, others and the world around you. Be a good person. Don't lie, cheat or steal. Be responsible for the things you say and do. An eye for an eye sometimes applies.

I think that these principals are fundamental to being a good person, no matter the religion. I have no intention of being reborn, or saved. I think that the line between religious freedom and the general rights has begun to blur dangerously too close. With religious protesters at the graves of fallen soldiers, suicide bombers killing in the name of their God, and inmates being saved and forgiven of their sins, I think I will stick with my simple ways on how to live my life as a good person, rather than follow an ancient book that has been manipulated over the centuries to read as leaders and clergy members want. And I hope that when I die, my soul is released in peace, not shared in heaven with forgiven rapists and murders, but free to just be.